Things I Learned This Week
March 8, 2008
This year the snow on the ground is wetter than normal (sweet… which means my basement will be wetter than normal). - Don’t buy Monster Cables, use coat hangers instead (cool, I can now put to use all those hangers I have in a mangled pile downstairs).
- Drinking raises blood presure but helps you live longer (decisions).
- “Daylight Savings Time” wastes energy (screw it, don’t go changing my clocks again on me… very suspicious coming from Indiana with their anti-standard time practice history).
- Bloggers are better adjusted and live healthier lives (just imagine the health benefits if you drank booze, popped an aspirin, and blogged everyday).
- NH received the lowest grade in the country on how it serves the public (come to NH for tax free shopping, just find a route that doesn’t use any bridges).
- Extended car warranties are a rip off (bastards… they always get you when you’re vulnerable though).
- When it comes to placebos, expensive is better (I wonder if anyone has though of getting into the designer placebo market).
- Be careful if you break CF light bulbs (do you get rebates on Hazmat suits too).
- “Shockwaves” cause traffic jams (we should be able to bump cars who slow down).
- Making flower is dangerous (how does one test a “explosion-proof” motor?).
- Pitch helps us stay focused on conversations at cocktail parties (”I’m sorry, I can’t hear you, do mind talking in a cartoon-like girl voice?”).
- You don’t need to read books to look like you read books (someone should do this for fake wine cellars).
- “Danny Boy” was written by an Englishman who never went to Ireland… it was also originally meant to be sung by a woman (I agree that is one depressing song).
- Gift cards are worthless after stores go belly up (bastards… get in line to get your money back).
- You can make espresso from tea (forget will it blend… what else can you put in a espresso machine).
- The Influenza virus loves the cold weather (evil).
- Better start saving $225,000 to cover health costs when you retire (I think I can afford a blood pressure check at that chair in the pharmacy).
- Salad isn’t a salad unless it is served in a bacon cup (someone should make a pizza with five types of bacon).
- Dover is looking for volunteers.
Entry Filed under: Learned. .
1.
Granite | March 8, 2008 at 1:32 pm
About that article grading NH public services: If the reviewers are giving Vermont a New England best grade of B- for wasting the public’s time addressing inconsequential items like teenage driver’s ed and global warming then clearly their review methodology points to their own head-up-assery.
2.
kreblog | March 9, 2008 at 8:20 am
True, last time I drove through VT I almost busted an axle on their highway.
3.
GiMMaY | March 10, 2008 at 10:57 am
I’m pretty sure the extended warrentee’s on my last 2 cars have paid for themselves in repairs I’ve had on the car.